eeeeeeek! =S

reason for the scary title is whats screaming inside my heart this very moment.

today i'm going to lisa's house in about 2 hours and 30 minutes and i'm shitting myself!

why?

well lets go to story mode, shall we?

lisa just invited me to go to hers yesterday morning and coz (like always) i have nothing else to do, i said yeah and i haven't been round hers in ages!

so we're all ready, just had to wait for the actual day til i read a bulletin on myspace from the person i like and said they had nothing to do on monday so here i was, stuck in between 2 choices. Shall i leave it and let this person find something else to do or be bored orrr invite this person with me and lisa and probs be even more bored!

and for some strange reason, i went with the second choice and the person said yes and of course, lisa was alrite with it alot lol

now here i am still shitting myself to this very moment of the thought of meeting this person for the very first time!

seriously, i really like this person and would do anything to be with this person! and thats what gonna make it so awkward!

i have bad experiences with meeting ppl for the first time.
espicially if its someone i like or chatted through msn alot.

like scott for example, we chatted a hella lot on msn and myspace before actually meeting up and when we finally did meet up, we hardly said hello to each other!

it took about 3 or 4 more meet-ups to actually get used to talking to each other but he wasn't still used to it but now i don't talk to him anymore. he was a moody cunt and i just can't be bothered.

but with this person its gonna be different coz i really like this person! scott was just a lil' something. not a huge humongus thing like this one!

i'm pretty used to meeting up with new ppl like with ramsey's mates, i never get nervous (well probably coz i don't fancy them) but argh! its gonna be soo different!

i'm not nervous of the fact that i'm meeting this person for the first time, i'm nervous at the fact that everything might not go so well and there'll be loads of awkward moments, i might even say something stupid or this person might even be as nervous as me!

and also, my friend hasn't exactly planned anything to do!
which is gonna be even more worse coz we're gonna be waddling around like penguins doing nothing! hopefully we'll think of something while we're there though.

but i must leave this for now, gonna take a shower and cool my head, try to relax and shit.

i'll tell ya later on how the day goes

thats if i'm not still not shitting myself from it all